Uses for a Padded Underwire Bra

by M.D. Creekmore on January 30, 2013 · 36 comments

This guest post by MountainSurvivor and entry in our non-fiction writing contest.

The usefulness of a underwire bra is not in its ability to provide a boost and keep things in place but that it is a true multiple-use survival tool.

After removal from the bottom of the cups, the wires may be manipulated into fishing hooks, a sharp tip created with a wire cutter or sharpening stone and a hole drilled at the opposite end for securing a thread through.

The cups can be separated at the center and re-connected with the right length of a piece of elastic, velcro or cloth belt strap to manufacture the gadget into a pair of earmuffs and then made a better fit by inserting thick soft fleece or pillow stuffing.

The cups can be used as knee’s or elbow’s pads to protect and extend the life of clothing.

One large ‘D’ or ‘E’ cup may have the capacity to cover a baby’s head when you have to travel in the cold or cool outdoors. Attaching a strap to keep it on the baby’s head can be easily achieved with covered velcro or yarn and diaper pins or duct tape. Securing a piece of plastic to the exterior and trimming it to protect the child from potential harm will help to ensure that they are dry and happy.

Bra straps may be cut down their length for replacing broken shoe’s strings, repairing part of a pant’s belt, creating hair ties, securing a bandana or do-rag, cinching one belt loop to another to tighten loose jeans and attaching to the corners of glasses to prevent them from sliding when the wearer’s nose is sweaty or oily or the ear pieces have aged to the point where they have spread out and no longer fit their head as they did when they were new.

The pointed area of the cups may work nicely for cutting to fit around a blistered foot; securing them is best left up to the wearer.

With the ends of the wires shoved into the ground and the top center of their arches spaced six or so inches apart, and a piece of clear or greenhouse plastic placed over top and secured to the ground with weights may provide a mini-greenhouse for sprouting “Sprouting Seeds” for eating or even growing to maturity or beyond.

Wrapping and securing a rock in a cup with rope or tape and adding a length of rope for throwing and retrieval purposes may enable a person who throws well to bring home a small animal for dinner.

The bottom of a whole, uncut cup filled with a layer of cotton and then an inch or two of fish tank charcoal and a second layer of filtering materials added over the first will allow a very thirsty person a means to clean their water so that they may hydrate their body.

Both cups lightly packed with dry moss and the edges secured together well with thread, fishing line, clear silicone or very sticky tape and decorated to resemble a soccer ball or circus animal will provide young children with a safe soft toy to toss around or snuggle up with during nap time.

This contest will end on February 16 2013  – prizes include:

Well what are you waiting for – email your entries today. But please read the rulesthat are listed below first… Yes

36 comments

JP in MT January 30, 2013 at 12:33 pm

I have found that most anything can have uses other than the original intent. Sometimes drives my wife crazy, the thinks I keep. However, as we have moved forward, as long as I have a reason somewhere in the realm of reality, she goes along with it.

MountainSurvivor January 30, 2013 at 10:24 pm

One day she is going to see how wise you really are and be thankful for it. Just make sure, if you pack any of these types of bras, that she thinks they are for her.

Santa Walt January 30, 2013 at 12:59 pm

To me this is more humorous than useful, but I liked it.

MountainSurvivor January 30, 2013 at 11:53 pm

Santa Walt,
Thanks.

Encourager January 30, 2013 at 1:01 pm

MountainSurvivor , You get the reward for the most inventive post!!! ROFLOL!! Instead of cleaning out a grocery store and fighting off the hoards, I will head to the nearest Victoria’s Secret and raid them!!!

Love it!!

MountainSurvivor January 30, 2013 at 11:27 pm

Encourager,
Don’t forget to take an AR-15 and a hunting knife because every female zombie will surely beat you through the door and, because they will fight to their deaths to keep what they have in their hands, you’ll have to settle for the old junk they’re wearing. Good luck and be safe.

Desert Fox January 30, 2013 at 1:10 pm

I don’t particularly like those wired bras…but the individual cups (foamless, of course) make a good coffee filter! ;)

Pineslayer January 30, 2013 at 1:30 pm

Desert Fox, I am resisting the urge to comment. For the record, the new header looks great.

MountainSurvivor January 30, 2013 at 11:33 pm

Desert Fox,
Worldwide statistics have shown that when tshtf, everyone scrambles for the creamers and sugars so hang onto any you come across because the wires will make awesome stirrers of which you can trade and barter with.

Rustymater January 30, 2013 at 1:17 pm

And here I was going to shirk my padded underwire, which begins to jab into my skin once the wire pokes through the material, for the softer alternative. I guess I will rethink that notion and still keep couple in my lingerie drawer.

btw very funny yet amazingly inventive :)

MountainSurvivor January 30, 2013 at 11:51 pm

Rustymater,
I’ve grown to hate them for the same reason but when a good bra has gone bad, we must try to rehabilitate.

j.r. guerra in s. tx. January 30, 2013 at 1:27 pm

Shoot – I was hoping to find out these ‘mammalian protruberence supports’ could be used to paraglide out of burning buildings – guess thats another post . . . 8^)

The person who can make something needed out of common items is valuable – great thinking outside the box thoughts.

MountainSurvivor January 30, 2013 at 11:52 pm

j.r. guerra,
Thank you!

Texanadian January 30, 2013 at 1:33 pm

excellent and innovative.

mindyinds January 30, 2013 at 1:57 pm

Brilliant! Using both the whimsical and the practical sides of the brain! I love using everyday objects for something not remotely connected to their original purposes, and consider such thinking very important to survival. One of my favorite books is the 2005 edition of Reader’s Digest, Extraordinary Uses for Ordinary Things – and my favorite birdfeeder is one I made from the internal parts of an old aluminum coffee pot. For example!

MountainSurvivor January 31, 2013 at 12:16 am

mindyinds,
You’ve struck my curiosity and I’m wondering how you put it together and secured it for the bird (inside a wooden structure, into hand-mixed cement, hung from a tree…?).

Ak cowboy January 30, 2013 at 2:20 pm

The best point made is to keep your mind open! Think outside the bra or box or whatever! Just keep thinking!o)

MountainSurvivor January 31, 2013 at 12:18 am

Ak cowboy,
lol.

Lake Lili January 30, 2013 at 3:33 pm

Love the continuity MountainSurvivor! Nice to know that underwire, like that other instrument of torture, pantyhose, has a redeeming purpose. NOw just as soon as the ice is off the river, I’ll head out to give the new fish hooks a try.

MountainSurvivor January 31, 2013 at 12:59 am

Lake Lili,
I heard that the fish are getting bigger and stronger since the Fukashima stuff has made it’s way over so try to remember to take a few extra pairs of pantyhose because the first pair you drop them into might not be enough to hold them.

Mama J January 30, 2013 at 3:37 pm

Funny, I have always felt compleled to save the underwires from bras. My thought was they must be good for something!

MountainSurvivor January 31, 2013 at 1:44 am

I’m glad that I could help shed some light on them. When I think about how useful the entire bra is, I am reminded that there were days when women burned bras and if they were still doing it today and a really bad disaster were to strike, we would have to watch out because they would surely plot to steal our fishing hooks, ear muffs and water filters.

Michigan Mike January 30, 2013 at 3:53 pm

Finding many uses for things other that their intended purpose is what we did as kids. But then we grow up and lose that knack. Nice post!

MountainSurvivor January 31, 2013 at 2:00 am

Michigan Mike,
We may trade one thing for the other but we will eventually re-discover it if we go looking for it. Glad the article was alright, thanks.

Tactical G-Ma January 30, 2013 at 4:04 pm

If you use your wife’s underwire bra for knee pads…you just might be a redneck. Lol!

M.D. Creekmore January 30, 2013 at 4:06 pm

Tactical G-Ma,

Have you had any trouble getting to the site or being redirected to another site?

LyndaKay January 30, 2013 at 4:20 pm

Thanks for the laughs and, more importantly, for the reminder to look for multiple ways to use something. “Necessity is the mother of invention” and one day we all might have to become more inventive. A+ MountainSurvivor!!!

Penny Pincher January 30, 2013 at 4:39 pm

Machine the end of a piece of an old underwire so it can work as a handcuff key, then sew it to your good bra so it’s riding exactly on top of the underwire inside the bra. Now you have a metal handcuff key that will probably not be seen by a metal detector or x-ray because it’s hidden behind something else of the same metal that is supposed to be there. You have to wait till you need it to bend it, so try that on a sample first and make sure it will bend and won’t snap on you. You can probably make several from one wire, if you cut it into pieces, and give them to other women. In a hurry or if you had no sewing stuff you could use medical tape to stick one onto the inside of your bra.

You can also make a handcuff key out of a bobby pin, but maybe if you were kidnapped the badguys would know about the bobby pin and take it away but not look at your bra. Many kidnappers use handcuffs.

Or you could make a little stealth knife, and then if kidnappers use zip ties you still have a way to cut your way out. You just have to get your hands in front of you first (step through them).

T.R. January 30, 2013 at 6:33 pm

Get a small rectangular piece of plywood , cut scrap 2×4 into two 14″ lengths , then screw them to the plywood , one on either end like a goal post . Cover with carpet remnants , then stretch the bra between the two posts ……………..then watch the kittens have a field day ! and if the cups are on the large size , you might catch one sleeping in it ………..the hammok thing from the other article ;)

T.R. January 30, 2013 at 6:36 pm

If somebody actually does this , I would love to know how it worked .

Aunt B January 30, 2013 at 9:01 pm

I’m putting a lock on my underwear drawer! Who knew those would become so valuable and useful.

Tactical G-Ma January 30, 2013 at 10:22 pm

Aunt B
Just imagine all the things you could do with an athletic support. Heehee!

rev. dave January 31, 2013 at 8:19 pm

Slingshot!

cowboy January 31, 2013 at 12:01 am

I’ll tell Shotgun about this, I proballie auta duck after I tell her. It is a very good post. Cowboy

rev. dave January 31, 2013 at 8:19 pm

Coffee Filters! Water Filters! HA!

Oops. Reverse the order.

JR from AR February 3, 2013 at 3:29 am

I might be a guy but I’m almost persuaded to start wearing survival bras…..almost. But since my DW has nice size…ummmm, wires in hers I’ll just make sure she is with me when stuff hits the fan

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