by Marjory Wildcraft
For the last few days there have been fairly strong winds blowing. I’ve been on edge, nervous, and fretful, but not quite conscious of it. Sort of like when the radio station turns to static and it takes you a while to notice it. Only today did I realize (again) that sustained strong winds have a disturbing effect on me. Do winds bother you? Have you noticed?
But even though I have ‘the answer’ to why I am feeling angst, I persist in wondering if it is just me, or are my feelings resonating with a larger collective nervousness?
So I look for outward signs to see if there is angst reflected out there.
First off, it seems there must be some psychological buildup from the whole Mayan calendar thing. But that doesn’t quite fit, and plus I am looking for something more tangible to demonstrate collective angst.
Oh yeah, there is that school shooting which has put everyone on edge. Or perhaps the shooting was an eruption of the collective angst we all feel. Which came first, the chicken or the egg? But regardless, the shooting is clearly polarizing us on a large-scale.
If you are in the prepper circles, then no doubt you are hearing all sorts of alternative news. And we are seeing a barrage of ‘2nd amendment is going away’ fear based marketing. It is compelling too – I am thinking, “gosh perhaps I should buy some extra magazines” or “hmmm, should I get that book on hiding guns and caching now”?
Yes, I confess – I have deeply indulged in retail therapy in response to the fear and panic that rises up from time to time.
My husband doesn’t think much of this ‘therapy’ from his perspective every month of paying the credit cards.
It is a good thing he loves me so much.
So I tune in to Alex Jones and brace myself. Sure enough, Alex’s take on the whole thing is that the shooting was a Gov’t sponsored setup with the sole intent of getting better control over us.
I am all too aware of how utterly corrupt our Gov’t is and I don’t put it past them. But what is really true? I start to go numb trying to comprehend all these horrible twists on reality.
But everyone has an opinion and there is real anger coming up over what should be ‘done’. Everyone is talking, blaming, pointing fingers… Worrying about what will happen next. Guessing the hidden agenda of Obama or the United Nations.
So I don’t think the wind is the sole reason for my nervousness. It is both a personal and collective energetic.
It’s night (it gets dark so early – oh yeah, duh! – winter solstice) and I am getting to my rounds. I notice the garden really needs some water. Its been quite dry. As I stand there magically able to offer moisture to the plants I notice how soothed I am by the big healthy heads of cabbage growing. I like to grow cabbages in big bunches every few years and make loads of kimchee. I’ve got jars that are four years old that are still good to eat. There are lots of good reasons to eat fermented foods (let me know if you are interested and I’ll write about it). Making kimchee is a super simple process that doesn’t involve ‘canning’. And it has stored fine in my Texas pantry all these years without any special cooling. To find a food that stores like that is an accomplishment.
As I stand in the garden I wonder, is it the comfort of knowing I have food growing that is so soothing to me? I’ve been soothed by my plants and livestock many times (someday I’ll write about which ones I’ve noticed are the most soothing). But perhaps I am feeling a kindness the plants send towards me. Maybe it is simply because it is quiet and peaceful out there.
No matter. I feel better in the garden. This little place of sanity in a crazy world. This place where right action is rewarded and stupidity is punished harshly. I love it. Whew, and thank Creation for it.
The winds are still blowing. But they are from the south and it smells like it might rain. That would be really good.